Several folk including myself see it as a good idea to open, here on the forum, a topic explicitly about what we are hoping for in terms of our own forum culture, and whether and how we want to have that managed or moderated. I’d like to start by rehearsing the guidance on the original “About” page. This is not intended to be controversial, but is an opportunity for comments if anyone sees potential improvements (I would say, including “less is more” style). Here we go:
Respect each other: Treat other members of the group with respect and kindness. Avoid using abusive or derogatory language towards anyone.
Keep it clean: Refrain from sharing any inappropriate content like sexually explicit messages or images, vulgar jokes, hate speech, etc.
Respect others boundaries: Communicating your boundaries and being aware of others boundaries will help maintain a good nature within the group, while making everyone feel safe. For example, if you want to reach out privately to someone in the group, ask for their permission publicly first.
Self-promotion, but not too much: We’re excited to hear what you are up to if it makes sense to share it in the group. However, remember this is a space for everyone, so keep self-promotion to a reasonable frequency.
Confidentiality: Do not share any personal or sensitive information about other members of the group without their consent.
Be responsible: Take responsibility for your actions and the messages you share in the group. If you notice any violation of the guidelines, report it to the group admin immediately.
Listen to others and respect each other’s opinions: Pay attention to what others are saying and show interest in their opinions. Do not interrupt or talk over others, and be open to hearing different points of view even if you disagree.
Be courteous: Say “please” and “thank you” when appropriate, and be polite in your interactions with others.
Avoid personal attacks: Do not attack or insult other group members based on their race, gender, religion, or any other personal characteristic. Disagreements should be handled respectfully and without attacking the person.
Stay on topic: Keep the conversations on-topic and relevant to the purpose of the group. Avoid sharing unrelated messages or spamming the group with unnecessary messages.
Be concise: Keep the conversation focused on the topic at hand and avoid going off on tangents. This helps to keep the discussion productive and respectful.
Share helpful content: Share content that is helpful or interesting to the group members. This could be news articles, memes, jokes, or anything else that adds value to the group.
Be active: Participate in the group regularly by sharing your thoughts and ideas. This helps to keep the conversation lively and engaging.
Are there any points here you disagree with, or would prefer left out?
After a while, we can bring in other points that we have been mulling over collectively, so that everyone has the chance both to take in and influence our collective culture.
I’d like to start by looking at 13: Be active. Personally I don’t want to impose on people the expectation that they will have relevant ideas formulated sufficiently to be presented. I’d like this to be a place where people may, if they wish, start by reading and learning from that. Where I do agree, though, is that if a reader does have ideas to share, that they don’t keep those ideas to themselves. I value different perspectives and different ideas, and I value highly putting them in the common space where we all have a chance to make sense of them and perhaps integrate them into a wider picture.
Thanks for posting Simon, I think its a good idea to just generally set more ground rules and expectations. I agree with all of the points, and I don’t think anything has been left out. I also would just like to encourage number three: ‘self-promotion, but not too much’- definitely interested in learning more about what others are doing, so would like to encourage others to share some of their work/projects, but obviously, as you point out, without constantly referencing it or posting it.
It also brings up the (difficult) question of: how to build off of these conversations? I certainly see the value of having conversations on a forum like this, but also, considering or keeping in the back of our mind more of a potential ‘workflow’. Just as a potential idea, perhaps once a month, we focus on one specific forum topic which was an especially good and timely discussion and turn it into a blog post?
Hey @Asimong taking the liberty here to offer a possible voice and tone for how we might articulate our ways of being together a gentle reimagining of “ground rules” in the spirit of the Second Renaissance.
Shared Invitations for Being Together
This space is an evolving commons a place for learning, connection, and co-creation. What follows are not rigid rules, but gentle invitations: ways of being that help us tend to the quality of our shared presence.
If you show up with curiosity, respect, and a spirit of contribution, the rest will unfold naturally.
Hold others in dignity
Approach each person with kindness and care. Assume depth. Speak to others as you would wish to be spoken to, especially when perspectives differ.
Share beauty, not harm
We welcome what uplifts, provokes thought, or stirs the soul and ask that we refrain from sharing anything harmful, degrading, or violent.
Honor boundaries: yours and others’
This is a space of mutual respect. If you’d like to connect privately, ask first. Let consent be a shared ritual of care.
Share your work when it serves the whole
We’re curious about what you’re creating. If you feel your work resonates with the conversation or context, share it thoughtfully and with humility.
Protect what’s tender and private
If something personal is shared here, let it stay here unless you have explicit permission to carry it elsewhere.
Take responsibility for your presence
Your words shape the atmosphere. If something causes harm, be open to reflection and repair. We grow together.
Listen with openness
Let others speak fully before responding. Make room for multiple truths to coexist. Listening is an act of stewardship.
Speak with intention
Let your words be clear, generous, and necessary. Say please, say thank you. It matters.
Disagree with grace
Tension can be generative. When it arises, stay with the idea not the identity. No one here is reducible to a single take.
Stay attuned to the field
Share what’s relevant to the collective moment. Trust your discernment: when to contribute, when to listen, when to pause.
Be brief when possible, deep when needed
Spaciousness is a shared resource. Let’s balance clarity with depth.
Offer value
Whether it’s a question, a story, a resource, or a reflection, share what you sense could nourish others.
Participate with aliveness
This space becomes what we make of it. Linger, contribute, return. Your presence is the architecture.
I love the poetic sense here. There’s so much more grace; I feel it softening me and opening to a heartfelt acceptance.
In parallel, I’ve been wondering how we can inhabit a similar space for people who, for whatever reason, are persistently behaving at variance with this. What I’m hoping for is a spirit of care, opportunity, reorientation. I have personally felt on the wrong end of this kind of situation at times. It’s so easy to judge others as incapable of change. Think of Carol Dweck’s “growth mindset” vs “fixed mindset”.
What matters to me is not whether someone is compliant now; what matters is whether people are open and ready to grow into a shared culture that includes this shared invitation. I believe nearly everyone has the capacity; the willingness is unfortunately cut off sometimes. To me, the new paradigm is inclusive of all whose heart is open and willing. I’m happy to play my parts: in being open to being led myself more into this space; in helping others into this space; and helping each other to help others into this space. Co-embodying the culture, and then also co-stewarding it forward.